Feed My Appetites: The Apparatus of Play and My Art Practice.
What makes Me, a Dominatrix, tick.
Video still of a rope session with a client.
Every Domme is fueled by their own pleasures, shaped by their upbringing and interests. I digested aesthetic kink through cinema and photography, living vicariously through a curated and highly stylized lens in My early teens. Growing up in America with immigrant parents, I was expected to follow their determined life plans for Me. It was easy to follow their rules because it allowed Me to avoid their distrust. In exchange for My obedience, My parents gave Me the space and freedom to roam their personal library. Additionally, I grew up in a very religious household, so I was bound by the chains of Daddy God (bless his teachings of shame). But within this precarious situation, My conservative parents had their own naughty curiosities hidden in books.
At an impressionable age of fourteen, I found a small, black hardcover book concealed under a stack of books in My parent’s room. I do not remember the name of that book, but what I do remember are the engaging writings about how to enhance the bedroom experience, with elaborate examples involving food, games, and water. This secret book was one of the early references for alternative deviations from My prudish upbringing. I have to admit, I hid it away in My room so I could read it late into the night. I even lied to My mother, denying I had ever seen it. In My household during My quiet rebellion, two things stood out the most: restrictions and holding secrets. This mirrors My present life and what I eagerly like to play with My clients.
Image shot by Ayoto Ataraxia. Converted into a playing card with My initials.
I like to think about My appetites as a deck of playing cards. The face cards represent My high-ranking activities, while the pip cards collectively work together to build the scene. The main desires I have—represented by the hierarchy of the playing cards—play a significant role in who I am today. These are: bondage (Ace of Spades), ownership (King of Diamonds), psychological play (Queen of Clubs), and servitude (Jack of Hearts).
As for the desires represented by pip cards, their importance depends on how much I engage with them. For instance, I’ll dabble in needles (8 of Clubs) every so often, but it is not an activity I actively pursue with passion. There are some I would love to try, but they won’t become My main focus—such as electro play. I’m not opposed to adding these activities to My playing hand; however, there’s something more potent about My favorite cards. It’s not because of their power, but how they actively move the game forward. That’s because the things I’m most actively interested in weave pathways of curiosity within My unwavering Eye—like the first time I made a submissive break and saw the shift in their body aligning with their subconcious. It wasn’t about release. It was about acceptance—of My control, and of their truth.
I found My way into My Dominance through My art practice. Art has a unique way of unlocking parts of ourselves that might otherwise remain hidden. It doesn't give us the answers, but it opens up possibilities for reflection. Just as twelve different artists can look at the same object and experience it in twelve distinct ways, art reveals how our personal perspectives shape the way we engage with the world. This diversity of experience highlights the endless potential for discovering new ways to see, feel, and understand our surroundings. Through art, we learn to embrace the richness of our individual journeys, allowing us to deepen our connection to both ourselves and others.
In My Dominatrix practice, I’ve found that the process of transformation—both personal and shared—is deeply intertwined with this artistic exploration. My work is about embracing constant evolution, tapping into new possibilities for growth, and inspiring others to do the same. Just as art reflects the nuances of life, guiding others through their own transformation becomes an opportunity to help them discover vibrant new ways of experiencing themselves and the world. My personal evolution is a reflection of the endless possibilities of play with My dear devotees, and by embracing this perspective, I can diversify My reflections—adding more color and depth to My submissives' lives and the lives of those I guide. There’s something powerful in embracing the unknown, in stepping into a space where anything is possible.
If you’re intrigued by the idea of discovering parts of yourself you never knew existed, you know where to find Me.
Remember to follow My Instagram (@saturn.veil) to see more pictures and reels of moi < 3. It’s private, elegant, sexy, and alluring.
Till then,
Saturn Veil
mwah
